There is a moment many women recognise. It may come gradually or all at once, but the realisation is clear: the desire to become a mother is strong, even if the right partner is not part of the picture right now.
At the same time, the conversation around motherhood is changing. More women are choosing to build families on their own terms, supported by advances in fertility treatment and greater awareness of reproductive timelines. What was once seen as unconventional is becoming a thoughtful and intentional path.
Quick answer: A single mother by choice is a woman who intentionally chooses to become a parent without a partner, often using donor sperm through treatments like IUI or IVF. With the right preparation, support and information, solo motherhood can be a confident and fulfilling way to build a family.
Lifestyle matters for fertility. A BMC Public Health study found that women with 4–5 healthy habits had a 59% lower risk of infertility.
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takes 3 minutes to completeThe term Single Mother by Choice refers to women who intentionally decide to become mothers without a romantic partner. This differs from women who become single parents due to separation, divorce, or other life circumstances.
Women who pursue solo motherhood often spend significant time considering their decision. Many reflect on questions such as:
Research shows that women who choose solo motherhood often approach parenting with a high level of planning and preparation, both emotionally and practically (Golombok, 2015).
Several social and demographic changes have contributed to the increasing number of single mothers by choice.
One major factor is the changing timeline of relationships and family formation. Many women spend longer pursuing education, careers, and personal goals before considering parenthood.
At the same time, women may not meet the right partner within their desired timeframe for having children.
Because female fertility declines with age, some women decide that waiting indefinitely for a partner may reduce their chances of becoming a parent.
Advances in fertility treatment have also made solo motherhood more accessible. Techniques such as donor insemination, IVF, and egg freezing allow women to pursue pregnancy independently if they choose.
As a result, fertility clinics are increasingly seeing women who actively pursue parenthood on their own terms.
Most women who pursue solo motherhood conceive using donor sperm. The most common fertility treatment options include:
Intrauterine insemination (IUI) is often the first treatment option for women without known fertility issues.
During IUI, donor sperm is placed directly into the uterus around the time of ovulation. The goal is to increase the chances that sperm will reach the egg and fertilisation will occur.
IUI can be performed in:
For women under 35, pregnancy rates per cycle are typically around 10–20%, although multiple cycles may be needed (Smith et al., 2015).
IVF may be recommended if:
During IVF, eggs are collected from the ovaries and fertilised with donor sperm in a laboratory. The resulting embryo is then transferred to the uterus.
IVF generally has higher success rates per cycle than IUI, particularly when multiple embryos are created and frozen for future use (CDC, 2023).
Some women consider egg freezing if they are not ready to become parents yet but want to preserve fertility for the future.
Egg freezing allows eggs to be collected and stored for later use, providing more flexibility in reproductive planning.
Although egg freezing cannot guarantee pregnancy, it may increase reproductive options later in life (ASRM, 2021).
Selecting a donor is one of the most meaningful parts of the process.
Options typically include anonymous donors, open-identity donors or known donors. Each comes with different implications, especially regarding future access to information.
Licensed sperm banks screen donors for medical, genetic and psychological factors. Beyond that, many women consider personal traits such as appearance, background or personality.
There is no “right” choice here. It is about what feels aligned with your values and future family story.
While this path is empowering, it is not without complexity.
Women often experience a mix of confidence and uncertainty. There can be excitement about becoming a parent, alongside questions about doing it alone.
Common reflections include:
Research shows that children raised by single mothers by choice generally do very well emotionally and developmentally, particularly when the decision has been well prepared.
What matters most is not family structure, but stability, support and emotional readiness.
Although the term suggests independence, solo motherhood rarely means being completely alone.
Strong support networks are a key part of this journey. This may include family, friends, childcare support or communities of other single mothers by choice.
Many women also find value in connecting with others who have taken the same path. Shared experiences can provide reassurance, practical advice and a sense of belonging.
Fertility treatment for single women is not equally accessible everywhere.
Some countries have inclusive policies, while others restrict access based on marital status or sexual orientation. Legal aspects such as parental rights and donor anonymity can also vary.
This makes it important to understand local regulations before starting treatment. In some cases, women choose cross-border care to access more supportive frameworks.
For many women, the biggest challenge is not the decision itself, but navigating the information and options.
Conceivio is designed to support women through this process by providing clear, evidence-based fertility education and personalised guidance.
This includes:
The goal is not to push decisions, but to help women feel informed and confident in whatever path they choose.
Becoming a single mother by choice is not about settling. It is about choosing.
It is a path built on intention, preparation and clarity about what matters most.
While there are decisions to make and challenges to navigate, many women find that this journey allows them to create a family in a way that truly reflects their values and timing.
Choosing solo motherhood often comes with both practical and broader parenting questions. Here are clear, grounded answers to help you understand the journey and the wider context around parenting styles.
Yes. In many countries, single women can pursue motherhood using donor sperm through treatments like IUI or IVF. Access depends on local laws and clinic policies, but solo motherhood is increasingly recognised and supported as a valid family path.
Most single mothers by choice are in their mid-30s to early 40s. This often reflects a combination of life timing, career development and increasing awareness of fertility decline with age. However, women pursue this path at different ages depending on personal circumstances.
A solo mother by choice is a woman who intentionally decides to have and raise a child without a partner. The term emphasises that the decision is planned and deliberate, rather than the result of life circumstances such as separation or loss.
A single mother by choice is someone who actively chooses solo motherhood, often through donor conception.
With modern fertility options, supportive networks and access to reliable information, this path is more accessible than ever.
What matters most is not doing everything perfectly, but making informed, thoughtful decisions that feel right for you.
American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM). (2021). *Planned oocyte cryopreservation for women.*
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). (2023). Assisted Reproductive Technology Fertility Clinic Success Rates Report.
Golombok, S. (2015). Modern Families: Parents and Children in New Family Forms. Cambridge University Press.
Golombok, S., et al. (2016). Children conceived by donor insemination and raised in single-mother families. Journal of Family Psychology.
Smith, J. F., Eisenberg, M. L., & Millstein, S. G. (2015). The use of intrauterine insemination for infertility treatment. Fertility and Sterility.
This content is for educational purposes only. It has been reviewed for scientific accuracy, but it does not constitute medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult a qualified healthcare professional regarding medical questions or fertility treatment decisions.
Reviewed for scientific accuracy by: Dr. Mona Bungum
Last reviewed: April 2026
Lifestyle matters for fertility. A BMC Public Health study found that women with 4–5 healthy habits had a 59% lower risk of infertility.
Fill out the questionnaire, and get a personalised, holistic and evidence-based programme tailored to you.
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