00:00:00 Hello. When you are struggling to get pregnant or to stay pregnant, there is a question that I know. You might be asking yourself all the time. What if it doesn't work? Or, what if everything I have put myself and my loved ones through is completely in vain? What if this entire journey and the countless treatments do not end with us having our baby after all? treatments do not end with us having our baby after all?
00:00:34 But even though this is the first thing we might think about in the morning or what keeps you awake at night, it is rare that we say it out loud. And often it is because you may have experienced that it is considered a taboo and that we tend to push these questions away until they shout so loudly for our attention that a distance is created between what happens
00:00:57 inside us and what we show to the outside world. This creates immense inside us and what we show to the outside world. This creates immense loneliness and isolation. But why? Can it be so difficult to speak openly about similar questions that we ask ourselves again and again? Firstly, many of the clients I work with believe that if we explore what we think, it will manifest in our world. Because if we think, it happens, then it happens.
00:01:25 Do you know what I mean? If I look, you in the eyes right now, you might know Do you know what I mean? If I look, you in the eyes right now, you might know that it's something worse, Brevillean. But we can feel an enormous pressure from both ourselves and our surroundings not to think about it, because then you won't get pregnant. You may have also heard that you just need to believe enough, that it will happen, that
00:01:46 you should stay positive and hopeful and avoid thinking about various conceivable scenarios. In reality, it actually relates to today's topic, how we handle disappointment and loss along the way. For it is the case that when people around along the way. For it is the case that when people around you say that you should stop thinking about it or try to relax, not stress so much, it
00:02:09 often has more to do with their ability to be present with you, and the grief that comes with experiencing that we do not have control over getting what we want the most, and cannot control when. It happens at all. The emotions you experience arising should not and cannot be fixed or shut down. Instead, we should practice being in all the and cannot be fixed or shut down. Instead, we should practice being in all the emotions
00:02:32 that come with it, including the difficult ones, as there can be both physical and emotional grief associated with them. But before we move on, I would actually like to talk a bit with you about what you experience as loss. As a sleep consultant, I often find that people come to me to talk about the loss of a person. But very rarely do people seek me out because
00:02:57 they have lost a job, a partner, a pet, a cycle or a pregnancy. Why is that? they have lost a job, a partner, a pet, a cycle or a pregnancy. Why is that? Often it is because we have not learned to take care of the grief that arises when we experience an emotional loss. Especially in situations like these, grief is a cycle you must skip. A cycle that represents the hope of becoming pregnant, but unfortunately did
00:03:24 not result in the pregnancy you desired. This form of grief can feel like a crushing blow, in the pregnancy you desired. This form of grief can feel like a crushing blow, as each cycle brings hopes and expectations of a new beginning. The loss is a pregnancy , but losing a pregnancy regardless of the stage can be one of the absolutely most painful heart-wrenching
00:03:46 experiences that one can go through. It is not only the loss of a child, but also the loss of the dream of becoming parents that can be unbearable and painful. The grief of being unable to conceive naturally. For some, this means confronting the need being unable to conceive naturally. For some, this means confronting the need for fertility treatment which signifies the loss of the entirely idyllic notion of achieving
00:04:11 pregnancy through natural conception. This realisation can be shocking and painful, and it can actually take time to process and accept. The loss of a friendship that was too difficult to maintain because your friend became pregnant. When your closest friends or family because your friend became pregnant. When your closest friends or family members become
00:04:33 pregnant, it can trigger a deep sense of loss and grief. It can feel as if their lives are suddenly moving in a completely different direction, while you yourself are stuck in endless waiting. It is important to understand that these forms of grief can have a profound effect on our mental and emotional well-being. They can also trigger a complex