Meditation to Cope with Emotional Pain

Video Transcript

00:00:15 you this morning a practice called Tonglen. Tonglen is a Buddhist practice. It's a mindfulness practice. This is something that's meant to be done at any time, right? So you don't necessarily have to be doing this when you're in meditation practice, when you're somewhere comfortable in have to be doing this when you're in meditation practice, when you're somewhere comfortable in a seat, carving out the time. This is the time where you're practicing this mind-body exercise so that you can then use it when you're at work. So you can then use it when you're with family that's triggering you. So again, we're practicing now, but then hopefully it's going to be something

00:00:51 that you're going to be able to bring into your day and your week and your month ahead. We're going to settle in. We're going to settle in. We're going to take our hands together, rub them. This is the initiation of our sitting practice. Rub, rub, rub. You can do this eyes open if you'd like. or if the eyes just wanted to close and they've already closed go ahead follow

00:01:20 your intuition trust yourself begin to slow that rubbing down and then stop your intuition trust yourself begin to slow that rubbing down and then stop pause gently pull your hands apart and place your attention in between your palms notice what you feel soften your belly soften your breath and then take palms notice what you feel soften your belly soften your breath and then take your hands. I'm going to bring them down towards your thighs, the palms facing upwards. Gently relax your shoulders, round of head lifting. Go ahead and close the eyes. We'll take three breaths now. Place your attention at the tip of your nose. Nice big inhale and as you exhale, release the

00:02:23 now. Place your attention at the tip of your nose. Nice big inhale and as you exhale, release the full weight of your body down into your pelvis, into your seat. And again, inhale, relax your low belly, let your pelvis receive your breath. Exhale fully, softly, soften. And once more, so you can slow the rhythm of your breath down. Inhale a little bit at a time, expand from the so you can slow the rhythm of your breath down. Inhale a little bit at a time, expand from the inside fill up and exhale all the way out release the weight of your being down imagine roots growing from your pelvis your legs anchoring you down into the ground mother earth source I'm going to start by simply paying attention to the physical body.

00:03:28 I'm going to start by simply paying attention to the physical body. Before we get into this Tonglen practice, it's important that we are in an open state and a receptive state. I invite you to notice with absolute non-judgment, with acceptance. I invite you to notice with absolute non-judgment, with acceptance. just notice how you are feeling how you are arriving in this very moment allow yourself to be just notice how you are feeling how you are arriving in this very moment allow yourself to be give yourself that permission and this in itself can be an i am statement give myself permission follow the rhythm of your breath with your attention pay attention to the full cycle of

00:04:51 follow the rhythm of your breath with your attention pay attention to the full cycle of breath. The breath is made of four parts. There's the inhale. And then there's the top of the inhale where there's this, it's almost like a pause in time. We get to slow down time in that pause. where there's this, it's almost like a pause in time. We get to slow down time in that pause. Pause between the end of the inhale, the beginning of the exhale. And then there's an exhale and the exhale is a release, a letting go, an anchoring down. Then there's another micro pause at the end of the exhale before your next cycle of breath begins before the inhale. As we end of the exhale before your next cycle of breath begins before the inhale. As we

00:06:11 breathe in this way it's important to relax your belly and so if it helps you relax your belly to take your hands to your low abdomen to your womb space you may want to hold yourself there. If naturally intuitively the breath wants may want to hold yourself there. If naturally intuitively the breath wants to pause either at the top of the in breath or the bottom of the out breath if you can lean into that pause that means that it will be a very small retention or maybe even a longer retention if you can hand over that control to your breath let your breath guide you if there's any resistance that comes up you can soften surrender and it's a physical softening

00:06:58 if there's any resistance that comes up you can soften surrender and it's a physical softening It's a softening of your shell, your skin, your body, your muscles. It's a softening of your shell, your skin, your body, your muscles. Because when your shell is soft, then prana, a vital life force energy within you, it can flow more freely. It has more capacity to move into the spaces where it is needed, where it is wanted. It has more capacity to move into the spaces where it is needed, where it is wanted. Trust in this process. Trust in that natural intelligence.

00:08:18 that inherent wisdom that your body carries and holds. Throughout the practice, if you notice your mind, your thoughts, you notice them wandering, you go into the channel of thinking. I want you to call yourself out. You can say the word thinking and then bring your attention back to the coming and going of your breath. Soften over and over again in your shell.

00:09:05 Relax and release. And in this way, you get to be, to be in your essence, you get to be in your inherent power, your authenticity, your higher self. I invite you now to take your hands towards your heart. I invite you now to take your hands towards your heart. And we're going to connect with the heart center, And we're going to connect with the heart center, a place of love, compassion, of joy.

00:10:28 I want you to imagine that each time you inhale, I want you to imagine that each time you inhale, of your heart is awakening, becoming a little bit brighter, a little bit fuller. Moving towards this practice called Tonglen, a practice where we rather than push away or resist Moving towards this practice called Tonglen, a practice where we rather than push away or resist Moving towards this practice called Tonglen, a practice where we rather than push away or resist our pain, our fear, that which brings about discomfort, rather than resist it, rather than push it away. We welcome it. We stand in our courage and our strength and allow in that which

00:11:44 push it away. We welcome it. We stand in our courage and our strength and allow in that which we resist. We practice this right now in this moment. I want you to imagine that you're breathing in something dark or heavy. So we're working with texture. You're going to go only as much as in something dark or heavy. So we're working with texture. You're going to go only as much as feels a little bit uncomfortable. We don't have to go 100%, but this practice should bring up a small amount of discomfort. We're sensitizing ourselves to the discomfort. Use visualization, a small amount of discomfort. We're sensitizing ourselves to the discomfort. Use visualization, use sensation. Imagine you're breathing in your pain, and then as you breathe out,

00:13:21 it's the opposite so we're not simply sitting with our pain but then as we breathe out breathe it's the opposite so we're not simply sitting with our pain but then as we breathe out breathe out a feeling of coolness of brightness freshness light on the inhale we welcome the darkness the discomfort and on the exhale we project from the center of our being that lightness and that brightness. You'd like to remove your hands from your body at any point you may and also use your brightness. You'd like to remove your hands from your body at any point you may and also use your hands to place them somewhere on your body that feels like it could use a little bit more touch, energy, love, somewhere that provides comfort. You sit tall and strong and as you breathe in,

00:14:25 energy, love, somewhere that provides comfort. You sit tall and strong and as you breathe in, opening to what feels uncomfortable, what feels painful. And as you breathe out, projecting from opening to what feels uncomfortable, what feels painful. And as you breathe out, projecting from your heart that source of light, of love, compassion. This is the simplicity of the practice. And with each breath, as you become more familiar, as this starts to maybe feel a little bit more comfortable. You can begin to imagine that as you exhale, you're projecting, you're projecting that light, that love from your body and beyond into the space around you, into your physical that light, that love from your body and beyond into the space around you, into your physical

00:16:05 space, that your source of light, your source of love and kindness can touch other sentient being, other humans who are also in pain, who are also suffering. And in this way, we not only heal other humans who are also in pain, who are also suffering. And in this way, we not only heal ourselves, but our own healing becomes a source of healing for humanity. And after your next cycle ourselves, but our own healing becomes a source of healing for humanity. And after your next cycle ourselves, but our own healing becomes a source of healing for humanity. And after your next cycle of breath, your hands are on your body. I invite you to bring them back down to your thighs, knees, palms can face up or down we're going to transition to a minute of silence to close

00:17:59 our practice so you can release the tonglen practice and simply come back to either noticing our practice so you can release the tonglen practice and simply come back to either noticing your breath following your breath with your attention or just resting your attention inside your vessel inside the container of your body in one minute of silence and bring your attention your vessel inside the container of your body in one minute of silence and bring your attention your vessel inside the container of your body in one minute of silence and bring your attention your in-breath now and breathe in a little bit more fully, deeply. And a soft exhale through your in-breath now and breathe in a little bit more fully, deeply. And a soft exhale through

00:19:31 your mouth. And again, nice big inhale through your nose. And exhale through your mouth with a and invite you to bring your hands to your heart and take your chin to turn towards your heart, your body your soul the light in me sees feels and bows to the light in you your body your soul the light in me sees feels and bows to the light in you and together we are stronger together we are one namaste

Full Transcript

[00:00:15] you this morning a practice called Tonglen. Tonglen is a Buddhist practice. It's a mindfulness practice. This is something that's meant to be done at any time, right? So you don't necessarily have to be doing this when you're in meditation practice, when you're somewhere comfortable in have to be doing this when you're in meditation practice, when you're somewhere comfortable in a seat, carving out the time. This is the time where you're practicing this mind-body exercise so that you can then use it when you're at work. So you can then use it when you're with family that's triggering you. So again, we're practicing now, but then hopefully it's going to be something [00:00:51] that you're going to be able to bring into your day and your week and your month ahead. We're going to settle in. We're going to settle in. We're going to take our hands together, rub them. This is the initiation of our sitting practice. Rub, rub, rub. You can do this eyes open if you'd like. or if the eyes just wanted to close and they've already closed go ahead follow [00:01:20] your intuition trust yourself begin to slow that rubbing down and then stop your intuition trust yourself begin to slow that rubbing down and then stop pause gently pull your hands apart and place your attention in between your palms notice what you feel soften your belly soften your breath and then take palms notice what you feel soften your belly soften your breath and then take your hands. I'm going to bring them down towards your thighs, the palms facing upwards. Gently relax your shoulders, round of head lifting. Go ahead and close the eyes. We'll take three breaths now. Place your attention at the tip of your nose. Nice big inhale and as you exhale, release the [00:02:23] now. Place your attention at the tip of your nose. Nice big inhale and as you exhale, release the full weight of your body down into your pelvis, into your seat. And again, inhale, relax your low belly, let your pelvis receive your breath. Exhale fully, softly, soften. And once more, so you can slow the rhythm of your breath down. Inhale a little bit at a time, expand from the so you can slow the rhythm of your breath down. Inhale a little bit at a time, expand from the inside fill up and exhale all the way out release the weight of your being down imagine roots growing from your pelvis your legs anchoring you down into the ground mother earth source I'm going to start by simply paying attention to the physical body. [00:03:28] I'm going to start by simply paying attention to the physical body. Before we get into this Tonglen practice, it's important that we are in an open state and a receptive state. I invite you to notice with absolute non-judgment, with acceptance. I invite you to notice with absolute non-judgment, with acceptance. just notice how you are feeling how you are arriving in this very moment allow yourself to be just notice how you are feeling how you are arriving in this very moment allow yourself to be give yourself that permission and this in itself can be an i am statement give myself permission follow the rhythm of your breath with your attention pay attention to the full cycle of [00:04:51] follow the rhythm of your breath with your attention pay attention to the full cycle of breath. The breath is made of four parts. There's the inhale. And then there's the top of the inhale where there's this, it's almost like a pause in time. We get to slow down time in that pause. where there's this, it's almost like a pause in time. We get to slow down time in that pause. Pause between the end of the inhale, the beginning of the exhale. And then there's an exhale and the exhale is a release, a letting go, an anchoring down. Then there's another micro pause at the end of the exhale before your next cycle of breath begins before the inhale. As we end of the exhale before your next cycle of breath begins before the inhale. As we [00:06:11] breathe in this way it's important to relax your belly and so if it helps you relax your belly to take your hands to your low abdomen to your womb space you may want to hold yourself there. If naturally intuitively the breath wants may want to hold yourself there. If naturally intuitively the breath wants to pause either at the top of the in breath or the bottom of the out breath if you can lean into that pause that means that it will be a very small retention or maybe even a longer retention if you can hand over that control to your breath let your breath guide you if there's any resistance that comes up you can soften surrender and it's a physical softening [00:06:58] if there's any resistance that comes up you can soften surrender and it's a physical softening It's a softening of your shell, your skin, your body, your muscles. It's a softening of your shell, your skin, your body, your muscles. Because when your shell is soft, then prana, a vital life force energy within you, it can flow more freely. It has more capacity to move into the spaces where it is needed, where it is wanted. It has more capacity to move into the spaces where it is needed, where it is wanted. Trust in this process. Trust in that natural intelligence. [00:08:18] that inherent wisdom that your body carries and holds. Throughout the practice, if you notice your mind, your thoughts, you notice them wandering, you go into the channel of thinking. I want you to call yourself out. You can say the word thinking and then bring your attention back to the coming and going of your breath. Soften over and over again in your shell. [00:09:05] Relax and release. And in this way, you get to be, to be in your essence, you get to be in your inherent power, your authenticity, your higher self. I invite you now to take your hands towards your heart. I invite you now to take your hands towards your heart. And we're going to connect with the heart center, And we're going to connect with the heart center, a place of love, compassion, of joy. [00:10:28] I want you to imagine that each time you inhale, I want you to imagine that each time you inhale, of your heart is awakening, becoming a little bit brighter, a little bit fuller. Moving towards this practice called Tonglen, a practice where we rather than push away or resist Moving towards this practice called Tonglen, a practice where we rather than push away or resist Moving towards this practice called Tonglen, a practice where we rather than push away or resist our pain, our fear, that which brings about discomfort, rather than resist it, rather than push it away. We welcome it. We stand in our courage and our strength and allow in that which [00:11:44] push it away. We welcome it. We stand in our courage and our strength and allow in that which we resist. We practice this right now in this moment. I want you to imagine that you're breathing in something dark or heavy. So we're working with texture. You're going to go only as much as in something dark or heavy. So we're working with texture. You're going to go only as much as feels a little bit uncomfortable. We don't have to go 100%, but this practice should bring up a small amount of discomfort. We're sensitizing ourselves to the discomfort. Use visualization, a small amount of discomfort. We're sensitizing ourselves to the discomfort. Use visualization, use sensation. Imagine you're breathing in your pain, and then as you breathe out, [00:13:21] it's the opposite so we're not simply sitting with our pain but then as we breathe out breathe it's the opposite so we're not simply sitting with our pain but then as we breathe out breathe out a feeling of coolness of brightness freshness light on the inhale we welcome the darkness the discomfort and on the exhale we project from the center of our being that lightness and that brightness. You'd like to remove your hands from your body at any point you may and also use your brightness. You'd like to remove your hands from your body at any point you may and also use your hands to place them somewhere on your body that feels like it could use a little bit more touch, energy, love, somewhere that provides comfort. You sit tall and strong and as you breathe in, [00:14:25] energy, love, somewhere that provides comfort. You sit tall and strong and as you breathe in, opening to what feels uncomfortable, what feels painful. And as you breathe out, projecting from opening to what feels uncomfortable, what feels painful. And as you breathe out, projecting from your heart that source of light, of love, compassion. This is the simplicity of the practice. And with each breath, as you become more familiar, as this starts to maybe feel a little bit more comfortable. You can begin to imagine that as you exhale, you're projecting, you're projecting that light, that love from your body and beyond into the space around you, into your physical that light, that love from your body and beyond into the space around you, into your physical [00:16:05] space, that your source of light, your source of love and kindness can touch other sentient being, other humans who are also in pain, who are also suffering. And in this way, we not only heal other humans who are also in pain, who are also suffering. And in this way, we not only heal ourselves, but our own healing becomes a source of healing for humanity. And after your next cycle ourselves, but our own healing becomes a source of healing for humanity. And after your next cycle ourselves, but our own healing becomes a source of healing for humanity. And after your next cycle of breath, your hands are on your body. I invite you to bring them back down to your thighs, knees, palms can face up or down we're going to transition to a minute of silence to close [00:17:59] our practice so you can release the tonglen practice and simply come back to either noticing our practice so you can release the tonglen practice and simply come back to either noticing your breath following your breath with your attention or just resting your attention inside your vessel inside the container of your body in one minute of silence and bring your attention your vessel inside the container of your body in one minute of silence and bring your attention your vessel inside the container of your body in one minute of silence and bring your attention your in-breath now and breathe in a little bit more fully, deeply. And a soft exhale through your in-breath now and breathe in a little bit more fully, deeply. And a soft exhale through [00:19:31] your mouth. And again, nice big inhale through your nose. And exhale through your mouth with a and invite you to bring your hands to your heart and take your chin to turn towards your heart, your body your soul the light in me sees feels and bows to the light in you your body your soul the light in me sees feels and bows to the light in you and together we are stronger together we are one namaste